Write tender poems and feel how your heart swells with love and gratitude

Practicing tenderness begets the gratitude attitude

Photograph by Naira Babayan

Dear hopeful reader,

Vocabulary.com elaborates on the word tenderness as “a feeling of concern, gentle affection, or warmth. It’s the quality of a person who cries when they see someone get hurt or who gently picks up a tiny kitten.”

I chose this explanation because of how vivid and clear it is, how it touches upon our most private, human selves. And while I’m sure there are individuals who think tenderness is a sign of weakness, I would rather agree with Gibran Khalil Gibran—“Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair, but manifestations of strength and resolution.”

I recall the poignant lines of Anna Andreyevna Akhmatova’s poem “You cannot confuse real tenderness…”

Настоящую нежность не спутаешь.
Ни с чем, и она тиха.

In English:

You cannot confuse real tenderness.
With nothing, and she is quiet.

When she wrote that, I imagine Akhmatova thought of tenderness as making homemade chicken soup to a loved one who’s sick; holding someone’s hand gently while they pour their heart out; bringing an item to a neighbor’s house because it is not there and it is needed; even writing a love poem to someone dear.

Also read: Poetry out of pain

I love writing tender poems, as of late especially. I started a chapbook project titled sun lore and other poems three years ago because of my need for tenderness—to feel it, to express it. I wanted to see if I could shift my focus into hopeful things, as opposed to my usual writing of melancholy, morose poems. While some poems in it explore the dark parts of our human psyche—as I am part darkling forever—most others are poetic love notes.

Something altered in me every time I wrote something tender. I would feel gratitude and peace in my heart for days. I try to practice tenderness in other ways. If I’m making soup for my husband when he has a cold, I think about how this soup will strengthen him. I mindfully add in my figurative ingredients of love, affection, and healing.

I’m not a very affectionate person, partly because my chronic conditions make touch unpleasant for me—almost like being burnt by fire, but from within. My love is shown practically. When it comes to making food, I pour all my care and tenderness into that act of love. My husband always asks me how I can make meals taste so delicious every time. It’s simply love, intention, a bit of creativity. (And also hunger.)

If you write poems and/or prose, I highly recommend writing something tender. Your heart will thaw and swell with love and gratitude. If you need inspiration and/or direction, you can read two of my own favorite lore poems below.

Also read: Write a poem about an endangered animal

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nostalgia lore

a happy place / it was not / & yet / when i walked the grounds of cobblestone / i could feel the grounding / of your presence / calling me home / a primordial comfort / kept me grounded / all those years / i sat in cafés / with a second cup / you were there / at one point in time / more than a feeling lingering / like london fog / still warm in my hands / remember the summit / bearing witness / to the glaring / of rising suns / setting moons / & ever changing hues / of leaves cascading / down/town nearby / remember the taste / of sweet bitter / when we never met / & still we miss each other

fledgling lore

a bird of white & blue fell from heavens / anchored to earthy tones / silent was her song / deep / in desperation / hours passed / as passersby / stood by / went by / when all hope is lost / only nature can take over / but / from shadows near / mama & papa knew / those legs will rise / her wingspan far-flung / gawkily she moved an inch / then fell / & fell / & fell / & felt it was the end / there is a turning / before an end / & many / before all ends / the ground shook babybird / skyward / sprightly soaring / whisper songs of faith / beneath her chest

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When you want to write a tender poem or prose piece, think about someone you feel great affection for. It may be a friend you know for years or just met, your loyal furry companion, or even a basil plant that feeds you.

If it’s a friend, think about how you met, what brought you closer together. If it’s your furry companion, think about what is unique about them, why you love them so, how your relationship is special and stands out from someone else in your household. If it’s your beloved plant, think about the fruits it reaps for your benefit, how it changes direction with the sun, how it absorbs all the negatives so you feel well and wholesome in your home.

May tenderness trickle into all areas of your life. May you have the gratitude attitude to take on the world.

Yours hopefully,

Nadia

PS: giveaway contest

This Tuesday I launched a giveaway contest of a phenomenal poetry book. I’m gifting a copy of BURN THE WITCH by Aïcha Martine to one lucky winner. Please read the post for instructions on how to participate in the giveaway and share it with other interested folks. Thanks so much!

Giveaway: BURN THE WITCH by Aïcha Martine

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